Juggling

I'm juggling too many balls at a time,
And last night at 11 I wrote these few rhymes,
Because you see deep down I want to try hard,
But I'm sinking so deep I need a lifeguard,
And it's tough to juggle from deep in the sea,
The balls float up but they don't come back down to me,
So I need to swim and grab them with my hand,
Gosh this would be so much easier on land,
But to reach the land I would need to let someone down,
It is definitely easier to hope not to drown,
I'm finally above water, maybe a revival,
Who am I kidding, best case is survival,
Cuz even when it seems all the balls are with me up top,
I know deep down that I've let a few drop,
I wish I could put more effort in you see,
I'm trying my best, that's the best I can be.